Uncountable times a day I fall into a sleepy state of wandering through imaginated scenes which are all constructed in my fantasy. They are reflecting my deepest wishes, a tale of everything I am longing for. I would float into a different universe where everything felt right. Where the colour of my skin is of no bad interest other than pointing out the beauty of human diversity. Where my parents are freed from their illness, having a bright and long life ahead of them. Where I see someone beautiful while looking into the mirror. Where a ever-loving boy appears to fill me with all the care and respect I have been craving for so long. Yet I am not supposed to dwell in this otherwordly haze for any longer, I realise quickly after reality pulls me back in to the here and now. The blurry vision fades and leaves back a sharpness that cuts my eyes and makes me want to escape again - from the misery that is me to the bliss that is my daydream.

The fruits were shining red, too beautiful and tempting to let them fade into the grey of regret. So you took them, made yourself vulnerable until the memories became a part of yourself. They crawled up your spine, into your vains and running through your blood until the caressing came haunting you every night. So remember, little darling, don't let it come too close again.

I thought I was a ship that could never sink. I learned how to float on the waves of light. Now, I'm drowning; the light is fading.

In a world full of bare branches and sharp twigs that cut wounds in our souls and let our hearts bleed a hundred aches; in a world where the setting sun leaves behind a world of endless grey that swallows optimists and spits out disenchanted realists - we all need a veil to protect us from the cold and to wrap us with warmth and shelter.

Sometimes I'm drowning in light. Too bright, to warm, to clear for me to absorb it. In these moments, everything is illuminated except from a certain dark shaded bitterness inside of me.

Every person should have his own utopic view on life. I want to open my eyes. Overcome the blindness. Be able to notice, observe and sense all the love and beauty that exists around us. Embrace, inhale and absorb it until it fills my lungs and my whole body. Remove the hate or keep it quiet to myself, let my heart be kind. Spread it into the world through words and through actions. I want this to be my very own Utopia to pursue even if life makes it impossible at times. That does not matter. The fear of failure should not keep anyone away from trying. Strive to be the best person you can be and you will fail, succeed, fail again and you will outgrow.

Of wanting to be a child again drawing stick figures and being proud of them, having no idea of all the pain and suffering that is spread in the world. Of wanting to be so carefree and happy about the tiniest little things in life. Of being at home, in a safe place offering physical but foremost emotional shelter.

P.S. Es macht mich sehr traurig zu hören, wieviel Hass Flüchtlingen entgegengebracht wird - seien es feindliche Demonstrationen oder Brandstiftung. Sie haben alles verloren, genau diese Zuflucht, die jeder Mensch braucht. Denn es sind Menschen, genau wie du und ich. Aber ich könnte mich tageland über dieses brisante Thema auslassen und darüber diskutieren - dafür ist hier nicht der Platz. Falls es jedoch irgendwen zum Andenken anregt, dann ist damit schon etwas gewonnen. Frohe Ostern und erholsame Feiertage wünsche ich euch!

Some barriers of an emotional, social or cultural kind are only products of our minds. We build fences to protect us from certain thoughts. Often because they are unfamiliar, too different from our own. We turn our back to the fences and ignore the beauty that radiates from the other side. Every time we manage to draw nearer to the fence is a chance to break down our mental barriers, the separation we create in our minds.